The Lifetime Experience: Strong Willed

February 11, 2015


It stared early… like 14 weeks early.  Little man was ready!  He was done and wanted to meet the world!

That’s when we knew he was going to be strong willed!

Our exciting and pretty easy pregnancy turned into an exciting pregnancy in an entirely different way!

We were in and out of the doctor’s office for testing.  In and out of the hospital for contractions at 14 weeks and so on.  We were in and out of the hospital because Linc would hold his cord… Tuck called it early oxygen deprivation training. We would laugh because that was all we could do!

We we worried but we kept pretty active.  As active as we could be!

I started to get some weird aches and pains (a broken rib here… a crazy sciatic there!)  Nothing that I was sure most women didn’t feel!

I was told to take it easy but no bed rest yet!  Thank goodness!  Pregnancy though wasn’t shaping up to be what I had imagined.  I really did think I was going to love it.  My mom loved it.  She told me she felt the best when she was pregnant and here I was, just like my mom, couldn’t wait to be pregnant… but I felt weird and gross and awful!  I felt nothing like my mom.  I felt nothing like what I thought I was going to feel.  This whole process, nothing was what I had expected, nothing was what I had thought it was going to be, hoped it was going to be.

I had cramps and contractions and was just broken down!

Then came the worst appointment.  I was finally 37 weeks and it was just a regular check up with NST.  I had to come in for regular NST since they were a little concerned about some things.  I wasn’t high risk yet… but they were concerned.  Tuck volunteered to go with me since I was being monitored more frequently but I was being positive and said no… it would be fine.

When I got there… I didn’t realize!

Working at the children’s hospital gave me enough information to freak myself out.  I knew too much but not enough if you know what I mean.

When the PA came in and told me that my baby’s abdomen was small and that if he didn’t come in the next few days or so they were going to “take him from me”.  I literally flipped my you know what!

I worked in the NICU briefly and I knew just enough about NICU babies to be horribly freaked out!!!

What in the heck did that mean.. his abdomen was measuring small?!

No questions were answered… she just kept repeating herself and I could feel myself getting angry and scared and worked up.  She sent me down the hall for another NST.

Thank goodness my Doula was able to get on the phone with me and help calm me down.  The nurses were MIA and the bells and alarms kept sounding on the NST machine.  Linc’s heart rate was all over the place and at this point, I was in panic mode.

Laura (my doula) was fantastic!  She reassured me that sometimes right before birth the baby’s heart rate slows down and that was probably what was happening.  She told me that no matter what the doctor’s were saying I was completely in the healthy and clear zone to have Lincoln and maybe that was what I should focus on right now.

She told me that God was good and that no matter what, He was going to give me the perfect baby for our family!

Once the nurses let me go;  I packed up my thing, got in my car and completely sobbed in the parking lot for 45 minutes.  I called Tuck and barely got out all the words.

I was scared.  I was a first time mom and had no idea what was going on.  I had been given no real information and no idea what was going to happen from here on out.

Tuck immediately left work and met me at home.  The two of us spent that Thursday evening just being together and trying to figure out the next steps.

It was a crazy Thursday night.  I didn’t get any sleep but when I did finally get up on Friday morning… I had some clarity.

I spoke to a few of my friends who did have truly traumatic birth stories.  Their littles were very truly miracles and are healthy and happy now!

I spoke with Laura again and she and I agreed that worrying wouldn’t do me any good!  I focused on drinking my red raspberry leaf tea and focused on actually inducing my own labor.

I never thought that 1 cup of red raspberry leaf tea and a dinner out with friends would do the trick!!!

You might be asking yourself at this point what does all this have to do with The Lifetime Experience?~

Trust me friends… it has everything to do with it!  All these moments and those to come (especially those to come) led me to create the Lifetime Experience and not only create it but to believe in it with all of my heart and all of who I am:   being and soul!

To hear more about our story with Lincoln and how this experience led to my Lifetime Experience… keep up next week!

To read part 1 and part 2… click here and here!



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