When I used to work at the children’s hospital, I would say it at least 2 to 3 times daily: “You are the mom, which means you know your child best! It doesn’t matter what anyone else says. It doesn’t matter what statistics say or the medical experts think. It doesn’t even matter what the norm is, whatever that means anyway. You are THE MOM… and you know your child best. You are around them 100% of the time and no one else knows or understands or loves your little one like you do. So whatever you are thinking or feeling; whatever is in your gut right now is probably the right thing!”
Now… fast forward 6 or 7 years later, I lost count because in those years I had my own child! I’m still giving off that same advice because hey.. it’s great advice and goodness gracious it’s the damn truth (yes I cursed)… but am I listening to that advice myself… NOPE!
Why is it that as mom’s we are so great at giving OUT advice, really great advice mind you, but we can’t heed it for ourselves? That one piece of advice in particular, about listening to our own intuition. Ya’ll a mother’s intuition is a real and awesome thing and I don’t mean awesome as in like DUDE… awesome. I mean awesome in the true sense of the word!
We know our little ones inside and out. We feel when something is right and good; but we also feel when something is off.
I don’t know if your like me but I’m a great advocate… for others. I can rally and stand up for anyone other than myself. I will go the distance and it doesn’t matter how great the conflict is or what the odds might be. I have a good intuition and I am willing to put myself out there for what I believe is right. However, when it comes to myself, I second guess everything all the time! I don’t trust my intuition when it comes to myself and that is something I need to work on in a very big way, especially as a mama.
I thought as soon as I had a little one of my own that mama bear instinct would kick right in… but I have to admit it comes in waves. I find myself mama bearing it up in the comfort of my own home and with people that I feel safe around, but when push comes to shove, I need someone to be me! To say those comforting words of “You are the mom… you’ve got this!”
Those words aren’t profound. They are words we already all know as mamas deep in our hearts. But sometimes hearing them out loud by someone else gives us the strength and courage to find that inner mama bear!
We just went through a really tough season with Linc and I hate to admit it but I questioned myself a lot as a mama. I questioned myself and sadly, I questioned Linc, something I will never do again. I think that might be a low point for me on the mama scale but you know what… that’s OK! I learned from it.
I learned that I’m NOT a perfect mom. HAHA I’ve known that for quite a while!
I learned that I can’t do it alone! I might have been someone who was a strong advocate before when I didn’t have kiddo’s of my own. You know, when I didn’t know the truth about how scary it is, how wonderful it is, how the love is blinding and terrifying all at the same time in the best way possible!
I learned that I need a support team, a village, mom pals! I need others who can remind me that I have “momtuition” for a reason and that yes what I’m feeling is very real and I should listen to it! We all should!
I also learned that it’s OK to be feeling all these feelings ya’ll!
Motherhood is HARD and it’s not going to get any easier! We are all going to have these seasons as our kiddos grow up. Some seasons will be amazing and others will be trying. Some seasons will be a time for us to be the strong advocates for other mothers around us while others will be the time for us to listen with our hearts when we are told “you are the mom, you know your child best!”.
But here’s the most important part… we NEED each other and gosh are we lucky that we actually have one another!
So here’s what I want you to do: If you’re with me (and please I hope you are!) call another mother today and let her know how much you appreciate her! Let her know either that she rocks your world with how strong she is… or that maybe “she is the MOM… and she knows her child best!” Whatever season you are in right now, call a mom pal and let her know she is loved and that her momtuition is spot on!!
Because no one understand us moms like we do!!!
Thank you to the amazing and beautiful Terri Z for capturing me up close and super personal hahaha! That was such a fun day and we shared some good mom talk too! 😉